Men Want Love 2

So its 4:23 in the morning and I can’t sleep. Its been a while since I posted, ok so its been an eternity, but I started a new job and its kept me extra busy, just know that I missed ya’ll while I was gone and I’m glad to be inspired once more.

The reason I can’t sleep is because my heart won’t let me. Seriously. I know that might sound straight bananas, but its true, I’m sitting up listening to music and with each song I hear I find meaning, I feel myself searching for something substantial, something tangible, something real. Donnie Hathaway, Carl Thomas’ “I Wish”, Alicia Keys “Diary” … each song moving me similarly and differently at the same time. (If you’ve never tried Pandora.com you really should b/c they create a radio station for you based on what you tell em you like. And they very rarely miss with the songs they suggest for you.)

Ladies, the truth is that the Fellas, myself included worry, wish, wonder, and wait just as you do. Men are truly emotional creatures, some of us know how to express ourselves better than others but we are definitely beings driven by passion and the need to feel appreciated, relevant, and alive.

I was recently asked what I wanted and needed in a woman. I consider myself a man who is very aware of what he wants in life and also a person that is decisive when it comes to the big things, however, this question perplexed me some, or at least I thought so. The truth is the more I thought about what I wanted, the more I realized the answer is that I want “Complex Simplicity”. I want nothing and everything at the same time, I truly just want her to just “BE”.

I know my above description may seem complicated or just downright sound outlandish but allow me to elaborate. I have never found anything more attractive in a woman than the fact that she is Herself, the queen of her own court, a real person. Straight up… I can’t stand commercial chicks from the Baller chasers/boppers, to the I’m So Independent that I gotta let you know how independent I am chick, to the I’m Rebelling but don’t know what the hell my cause is chick.

I love the idea that a woman can “BE” without having to tat it on her ass, forehead, and Afro (respectively, LOL). This is not me judging or indicting a particular type of woman but merely me attempting to convey that we do dream about you, and hope for you, and believe that you are out there for us: A woman that is who she is because that’s who she is, not because that’s what she looks like, or because she’s what someone told her she should be, or because another dude broke her spirit and made her believe that Good Men that want to love you the right way CAN’T EXIST on this Planet.

The common misconception for many men is that women are difficult to figure out, but, I beg to differ. The way I figure out what a woman wants is by thinking about what I would want if placed In the same situation. That’s what I want, that’s what I want my woman to want: Reciprocity (a mutual admiration and respect that allows us to thrive on the ability to both give and receive from each other without feeling like it is an OBLIGATION). A scene from “the break-up” comes to mind where Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Anniston get in an argument about washing the dishes. She tells him that she doesn’t want to have to ask him to wash the dishes because she wants him to want to wash the dishes. He responds “Why in the hell would I ever WANT to WASH the DISHES”. What she was really saying to him was (I just need to know that you have my back, that you are there with me, that you want me happy because it makes you happy, and I want you to know that I don’t WANT to WASH dishes EITHER, showing that you are willing to do something pleases me, and knowing that you expect me to do the hard stuff alone disappoints me). I want someone who wants to wash the dishes… I want someone that makes me want to wash the dishes.

I want the desire to please to come from a sincere place, I want genuine desire, genuine passion. I don’t want a girl that Blurts out “let’s have sex now” (LOL) I want a woman that knows how to get what she wants when she wants it and can convey it to me without even saying a word. I don’t want a Christmas, Birthday, and anniversary “headgiver” (lol hope I didn’t throw some of ya’ll off the story). Don’t fake the funk, if you don’t do it, don’t feel obligated. I’d like it a lot more if it came from a place with far less reason than an annual event occurring. I want to feel special every day… not just on special days. Don’t you?

I want her to be comfortable with me and I want to make her comfortable when she’s not. I want to listen to her because I just like hearing what she has to say and because I like being the one she wants to share her hopes with, her fears with, her joys, her triumphs. I want her to like me for the same reasons. I want somebody that I dream about, even as I lay right next to her, and someone I day dream about even as I awaken beside her. I want a woman who can enjoy playing childish games and laugh and joke when we make love, but who is mature enough to be able work through problems without reacting childishly when faced with those problems.

I want to be loved with a blind passion and want to be allowed to love with all of my heart all the time. I don’t want to play games. I don’t want to hurt or be hurt, because Men, despite the contrary beliefs, ARE VERY EMOTIONAL. How else would I justify sitting up at 5:20 a.m. talking about the type of love I want.

At times I feel void, I feel myself searching, I feel my heart wanting something “GOOD”. Something that makes me smile, someone I can make smile. We want the Movie to end like it does in “Hitch”, “Jerry McGuire” and any other film where the guy realizes that without this woman he will never be who he wants to be completely. I honestly want to make that speech. I want to meet the woman that has me at hello. I want The woman that I love so much that I stand in front of the car to try to stop her from walking out of my life. (No Stalker- Tip though Lol)

Right now on my radio station is a song playing called “Soulmate” by Natasha Beddingfield. Yah I think I could live with finding her or with her finding me, or with discovering I’ve already found her.

Which brings me back to a woman with complex simplicity. You are “complex” because you are unique. You are the only you that exists on this earth. No one else has your quirks, idiosyncrasies, or dreams. No one else has mine. What makes it “simple” is that we both share these characteristics and so long as we recognize it, understanding and learning from each other reveals that the desires that at times may seem so different when it comes to the sexes is really the same thing: Reciprocity born from love, rather than obligation.

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Have You REALLY Experienced The Best Orgasm EVER?!?

*This blog is going to have me remove the link from my email signature, lol. I'm going to get a lil personal to talk about orgasms and something I just found out; sharing information with you readers :)*

I was in a 7 year relationship with my sons Father and NEVER had an orgasm via penetration, only orally or through masturbation. YES, I faked it (52% of women regularly fake orgasms - only 17% are likely to have an orgasm during sexual intercourse, because the clitoris often is not stimulated enough by intercourse alone.) It wasn't until I was 22 and started dating this really amazing guy that I had my first orgasm from the cock, lol. He was VERY special to me and I believe that is why I indulged in such pleasure. Did I mention I'm extremely loud when I climax? Like damn near screaming bloody murder loud, lol. It sounds funny and nothing I can control, well I can but the orgasm sucks money balls if I don't scream. I actually encourage everyone to attempt the motion of yelling out a scream when coming, I PROMISE your orgasm will be 20 times better.

Moving forward, there have maybe been 4 men who have made me come, but again, I'm able to do so orally and by masturbating. So I start seeing this guy earlier this year and OH MY STARS, not only do I scream in the mist of coming but I LAUGH!! YES, I am laughing uncontrollably. He gets a kick out of it - I'm not even sure if he knows I've never experienced it before. It's not something I always do because I don't always come when we boink (*smiles*) but when I do I scream, laugh, I come 5 or 6 times :/. I cannot recall ever having someone make me come more than once if he is lucky to make me get there, lol. (43% of women report “some kind of sexual problem,” such as inability to achieve orgasm, boredom with sex, or total lack of interest in sex)

So today, after going to Mars & beyond recently (yes, the shit was out of this world), I decided to do some research on "laughing while coming". It is NOT uncommon at all - go figure. It is actually said to be a HARD orgasm, its the explosive release of intense emotion. Laughing, smiling, crying, or passing out right after orgasm are different ways the body displays its state of complete relaxation following the built-up tension of climax.

So if you're one of those laughing people, just know you're not alone and you are possibly getting a better sensation of pleasure than the every day person; you're coming harder. :) It is indeed a GIFT!! I'm not sure why others may experience but I know for a FACT why with him I experience it, I would say but its a secret, lol. Check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orgasm found out some pretty interesting things.

Man, I'm ALL Over The Place! Boys Suck, lol

Random as thoughts - missing someone I know I probably shouldn't be missing but hey, he has a hold on my heart.....

You're perfect when we're not fucking:
-You're kind
-You're aware
-You're attentive
-You're conversational
-You're entertaining
-You're my FRIEND
-You express an interested in me

You're perfect when we are fucking:
-You hit the right spots
-You're gentle with your touch
-Your kisses are heavenly, like for real
-Your love below pleasures my love

Climbing on top of you with my feet planted flat on the bed, as I straddle you - as soon as you glide inside of me I feel a sense of relief, a sense of comfort, like a welcome home hug as if you were overseas; you fit perfect.

LOL - let me stop, you know you get me hot and bothered! I'm laying on my couch with my right foot thrown over the top and left leg on the floor - legs open. Sure would be nice of you to walk in right now, walk over to me and plant a sensual kiss on my lips. Skip the sissy shit, I want you to fuck me, like really fuck me! Me rubbing your bald, soft head as your going in and out of me hitting the back of my ooowwee. MAN, just the thought!

It KILLS me because I can only get one perfect at a time. Yea, I bitch, fuss and give you hell when we are chilling, its cause I want those same things you do to get me. You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks or even months over-analyzing a situation. Trying to put the pieces together, justify what could've, would've happened...or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on - TuPac

Stop fooling yourself, B! You give me butterflies, you make my heart race; I've been consistent with my feelings for you. Time to think about what you like about me and see if it overshadows what you dislike. If so, you've got your answer to the question you asked me today.

Man this is all over the place! To the readers - maybe you can answer, why is getting to know someone soooo difficult now? Why must extra shit be involved? We are young and courting one other, so other parties will be involved as far as dating - I don't think asking you to be honest and let me know how tight you are with someone is asking too much. Why does it fall in the "that's my business" category? COMMENTS?

10 Signs That They're Not Really Into You

I originally titled this blog (He's really not that into you) but changed it because I felt that it was a two way street and that men and women alike do it. Feel free to comment or add to it. I'm not saying these are the only substantial factors but they are pretty good indicators of where you are headed w/who you perceive to be your significant other.

PRESS PLAY... fits well w/ the blog.




10 Signs That They're Not Really Into You

- They can't communicate with you on their own problems. People who can't communicate their own problems to you, will have a great deal of difficulty working through problems ya'll have together. If they really are into you they'll be able to tell you how they feel when they feel it, because you're worth it.

- You can reach them from everybody's phone number but your own

- Conversations of your goals and your life don't interest them, but conversations about your favorite sexual position have their undivided attention

- Everytime they come to see you they KEEP Forgetting that present they got you for your birthday that was a month ago

- they drape you in material things, but disregards the little things (like your little brother's name or your favorite candy) (they are just keeping your mouth full and your belly fed so you'll shut the hell up and stay off their back)

- they just don't like talking on the phone (if you are special, they'll make that exception)

- If they don't call you out on your bullshit and tell you when you are wrong, their not that into you (and if its a guy, hes weak, get away from him)

- If you have never chilled together while the sun's still up (either they're not that into you or the nigga is Dracula, PROTECT YOUR NECK)

- If your climax is not a priority nor turn on to them and if they don't give it 110 percent from the heart everytime ya'll are in the bedroom (or floor, or car, or shower... your choice), what are you wasting your time for you should be giving that opportunity to someone who deserves it (on the reverse if they do all these things the right way and you still dont get yours YOURE probably just not really into them).

(don't let the one you're with be half-assed)

Thought of the Day: Monday 06-02-08 Puzzle "Peace"

Some people are architects, but not even they have a blueprint for love. Do we know ourselves 100 percent? Should we before we commit ourselves to another? Yes to the second, only if you can say yes to the first. Its impossible to give your all to another if you dont know what your all is. If you are still searching for the true you, you will have a great deal of difficulty trying to show your companion how to find you. This is not a reason to lose hope; because, knowing yourself and being a complete person are two totally different things. Its ok to be imperfect b/c though you can aspire to be without flaws we will always fall short. Somewhere, out there, however there is someone that will fill the gaps where you have shortcomings, finish the thoughts when you cant quite find the words, someone whose hand fits perfectly into the grooves of your hand like a piece to a puzzle, our puzzle piece. We cant possibly know who they will be, what they will look like, because they could be anyone from the person you never speak to at school, to some stranger you havent met yet. There is someone out there for all of us to teach us, to learn from us, to complete us. A neat freak for the slob, a comedian for the straight shooter, a freak for the prude, a saint to guide the sinner (hopefully). And so we come full circle to my original point, love is chaotic, if it was ordinary and structured and easy, we wouldn't value it the way we as humans do. We can't map it out, because we don't know our destinations. We can, with eyes wide open, let the wind guide us and chance reveal its mysteries. (At least its pretty to think so.)

Lil Dick Men Need Love Too :)

I can't really speak for CJ - we actually do not know one another and I don't know much about his life personally - but even though I write these stories and what not, I'm actually NOT that sexually active. I'm someone who will go 6 - 8 months without sex and not give it a second thought. Most of the stories I write come from imagination with a little insight from people and their lives. Or I'll see something and just write about it.

Don't get me wrong, yes I enjoy sex but I'm weird with it. Check it - ok, so I'm like 5'5, 133 and I LOVEEEEEE men who are 6'0 (or so) and weigh about 220-225 (or so) with POT BELLIES!! OMG, I LOVE pot bellies. I also like small dicks, lol! Ok, sounds funny - and don't go thinking I can't handle no dick, cause TRUST me I can (I enjoy a big one when it comes down to suckin a dick, I've got killer skills - more on that later...LOL). I really have no reason why I like them and not to say the guy I'm boinking now has a lil dick, I just do. The guy I'm boinking now is actually PERFECT! Pot belly and PERFECT size dick that fits every where PERFECT :). He's a very great lover who I'm able to explore many positions with - I didn't know sitting on a dick could be so fun, lol. Naw, let me stop - he's great though.

Ok, I'm just babbling on- this whole blog came from having conversation with someone I used to boink. He is slim, nice 6 pack, HUGE dick - etc and he is asking about us hooking up or whatever. I'm telling him it's not possible because of dude I'm dating right now and he starts asking me hows the sex. LOL. I told him my friend has a pot belly and I love it, etc, etc and he's like WTF yo!! lol. I think I bruised his ego - not my intentions but I love what I like. He knows my friend and I don't boink much and he made a comment that he must be doing something right for me to go a month and not think about fuckin w/ anyone else. Ok, dude was good in bed but he is a rough one - I love my snatch too much to have it beaten up like one of Michael Vick's dogs..lol.

Yea - so now everyone knows, I'm not some freak nasty, sex nympho...lol. I'm a foxy looking chick who loves everything the everyday chick that looks like me wouldn't like :)

Thought of the day 5-30-08: A mini Chocolate Drop

play me as you read this:




*To the women out there that are screamin that there aren't any good black men ... you know in your heart that you're a damn lie. There just ain't no good men that meet all your qualifications. The nigga that you need might not be six feet, with six figures, a six pack, on twenty sixes, the ones you pass by might be the one that will listen to your ass seven days a week, till seven in the morning, about the seven different problems you tryin to deal with, and he might take the time out to love you seven hundred different ways. Don't limit yourself by the ideals you idolize and measure your own value by what material things a man can provide. Open yourself up to optimism and opportunity so that the superficial doesn't suppress your chance at true love. The only difference between an ordinary person and a genius is the way they allow themselves to see things. The next time opportunity knocks be smarter than the average bear.


*This message is not addressed to women in general, just the ones to whom it is referenced, and Niggas don't think you getting off that easy... You are next on the agenda. LOL!

Freestyle Erotica

I'm OFTEN asked if my stories are from experience - I reply no and of course they don't believe me. I seriously get my inspiration from people. I was going to post an old story up but I decided I'd freestyle a bit - but with a twist. I went on a Friend's site and snatched a picture - the picture represents the story I am about to write off the top of my head - showing the world, that I can indeed freestyle :). I like the Nas of this erotica story shit! Get off me, yo!!


Photo by Andrew Thomas

It seems lately you love your Old School Super Mario as much as you love me - today I had to urge to combine your two loves together. The smile on your face when you walked through the front door assured me this was indeed a gift you'd enjoy.

As you walked up to me, you cupped my face within your right hand - allowing me to stare straight up in your eyes as you looked down on me. Biting my bottom lip, I take my right hand and reach up to your waist and begin to unfasten your belt buckle - with your free hand you decided to help me out because you knew what was coming. Getting past the belt, the zipper and finally sliding your pants down to your knees, I take my tangled-in-nintendo cord left hand and slide my fingers into the pocket of your boxers to find the treasure my pussy has been yearning for all day. Leaning forward towards your frame, you thrust the fingers of your right hand through my hair as I lay the door mat out to welcome your love inside of my mouth. Wrapping my tongue around the tip of your dick and consuming the rest to reach the back of my throat, I allow the walls inside of my mouth to build up saliva as I glide you and out of my mouth. Gracefully, yet roughly, slurping the tip of your dick each time it reaches my lips, you moan with pleasure allowing me to know to keep doing it just like that.

After another 10 minutes of loving you with my tongue, you asked me to lay back on top of the TV. Doing as I was ordered, I grip the side of the TV and easily position myself with my back on the TV and legs spread apart with my feet touching the floor. Wrapping the control around my neck like a choker with my right hand, I began to squirm a tad as you looked down on me with your dick in your right hand. Slowly stroking the head of your dick, just watching me move my body around like a fish out of water turned you on. Standing in between my legs, you took your left hand and lifted my right leg on your shoulder - never stopping the self pleasure game you had going on with your dick. Doing the same with my right leg, I assisted you some and lifted both legs in the air and swung them slightly over my head - giving you a beautiful view of my fat pussy sitting plum and luscious in my bikini shorts. Kneeling down on your left knee and then your right, you stopped the strokes and tugged at your dick as you began sliding it over my shorts. You got so into it, I felt you slapping your dick on my clit. Grinding your hips as you got closer up on me, I heard a thump as you knocked over the game system that was leaning against the TV. I could see you in front of me stroking your dick again as you reached your left hand out to grab my right breast. Seductively fondling it, the multiple things you had going on turned me on so much I found myself reaching my left hand between my legs and rubbing Ms. Kitty.

As our moans filled the room, your breathing began to switch up some. Getting up from your knees to stand back up, you walked to the left of me, standing over me with my legs still in the air and touching myself, you pushed my legs back slightly and began tugging at your dick more rapidly. Crossing my ankles with my legs in the air and Nintendo cord sliding down my legs, I reached up to you with my free right hand, crossing over my body, and finding my way to your nut sack and cupping them in my hand. This position is not working, taking my right hand and attempting to massage your balls, I heard your voice get real deep as you said "I'm coming Baby" - quickly sitting up and putting my face to meet your fist ed hand, I opened my mouth, stuck my tongue out and licked the tip each time it came through the hole of your fist. Seconds went by before I felt your sticky icky icky on the tip of my lips - opening my mouth wider, I shoved your dick inside and slurped your dick like I was drinking an icee. Ummmmmm! Best Nintendo game ever, aye? :)

Press Play: A Chocolate Drop

(Song Playing) "Sometimes its soft as a misty Rain.." Slowly, rain drops flowed freely, in imperfect lines, down the Windshield of Jarron's car. The pounding of the downpour against the roof of the automobile, coupled with the blaring horns of anxious drivers and SWV's "Rain" on the radio were strangely calming. All day he fantasized about sitting in the silence of their living room and tasting the softness of Shauna's lips while being pleasantly trapped in the grip of her hungrily strong thighs. Something about the rain just made him desire to be inside, desire to be with her. "Rain down on me..."

Drenched by the relentless showers, Jarron's clothes were clinging to him, heavy and cold. The click of the lock giving way as Jarron inserted the key into the door signified to Shauna that her man was home and a rush of excitement went through her body. Turning the doorknob slowly and pushing forward, the refreshing scent of fresh linens, intermingled with the flickering glow of scented candles engaged Jarron's senses. He thought to himself "She can get it!" Shauna thought to herself "Oh he gone get it!"The last glimmers of the day were gone and there was only the night, the rain, and the music. (song playing) "Here we are all alone you and me.." Closing the door behind him, he dropped his suit coat to the floor. Shauna, in a black dress that could hardly hide her perfectly curved body, walked down the stairs to meet him. Before she could get to the bottom of the stairs to utter "Hello... or how was your day..." Jarron rushed her pinning her back and hands to the wall, and began kissing her as though he hungered, rather than desired her. She liked it. A wry smile curled over her lips as she kissed back biting his bottom lip, and feeling his wet shirt against her chest, his cold face against her lips. Sliding his hands slowly down from the underneath of her arms, to her sides, to her hips, underneath her dress, he lifted the dress just enough to reveal her black boy cut panties and the rise of her perfect ass. Kneeling before her he placed one of her legs on his shoulder, as he rubbed the front of her caramel thighs with his other hand. Gripping his cold, wet head she pulled his face forward. Jarron, gripping the underneath of her leg, began running his tongue along the inside of her thigh, getting closer and closer to her soft lips. She whispered "Kiss it, J" and he obliged... appreciating every second he could taste her.... "We can do it anywhere".

His tongue glided across the underside of her soft, damp pussy, parting the center of her femininity. With one hand She pressed his face against her pussy and his nose brushed gently against her swollen clit. With the other hand, she dug her nails into the smooth blackness of his shoulders. Chills ran throughout her body from her toes to her temples, as the heat from his lips and gifts of his tongue tortured her clit pleasantly. He placed both her legs on his shoulders as he continued to kneel before her, and she was suspended there her back against the wall with only Jarron's mouth and hands to hold her up. His Tongue flicked ferociously as she continued to moan and with a firm grip on both ass cheeks he squeezed as though he wanted to milk her for every drop she had. "So wet!" Jarron could barely get it out, overwhelmed by his woman's pleasant taste.

Without a word he stood her up and with a controlled violence he spun her around. He placed both her hands against the wall, and caressed her scalp, locks of her hair were trapped, intertwined in his fingertips. He pulled it softly exposing the caramel skin along the length of her neck to his lips. While tickling her clit with his left hand, he slid his tongue from the nape of her neck to her ear lobe. With his lips just close enough to brush against her ear when he spoke he asked "how bad do you want this dick". Without a word she reached down between her own drenched legs, and grabbed at his rock hard pipe. "MMM" she moaned as though this were her ideal meal, she squeezed three times, knowing what was in store. Jarron slid his left hand up to her lips and she began to suck his fingers. The taste of her self excited her even more. He grabbed his shaft and slid it along the underside of her pussy, with just a touch he was coated in her juices. Each time he moved his swollen head back and forth against her lips she let out soft, satisfied sighs, and sucked his fingers even harder.

He slowly began to penetrate her, descending inch by inch into exactly where she wanted him to be. Her pussy responded to the precision of his stroke with soft sounds of ectstasy, much like the sound that raindrops make as they become puddles. As sweat beads began to form along the small of her back, Jarron's thrusts became stronger, cutting into her like a surgeon's knife. Her walls squeezed tightly against his thick rod, and she could feel him, even in her stomach she felt his stroke.

Outside the thunder clapped as the rainstorm continued and it seemed as though his deep, animalistic pounding, strokes, came simultaneously with each hit. He crashed into her pussy over and over again, gripping her hips and pulling harder. Her juices splashed against his thighs overflowing like a river in the midst of a torrential downpour. His dick darted in and out of her and as she attempted to squeeze and throw it back against him she knew she was reaching her breaking point. Again he crashed against her like the thunder, and she was wet like the rain, and her pussy ached so good, and was so warm.

Her legs became weaker and it felt as though the only thing that was holding her up now was the fact that he was inside of her, and unable to withstand anymore her pussy began to release, squeezing and contorting itself, no longer under her control "FUCK J, I'm Cumming!" She dropped to her knees his cock deeper, still inside her pounding she reached back and grabbed his ass pushing him deeper inside, as hot jetstreams coated her walls and he let out a growling yell "AHHH! SHiT!" Each time his shaft throbbed she sensed his release. They felt like small, piercing, shots, inside her.

They laid there together silently and soaking, their naked bodies keeping each other warm. He continued to hold her closely, kissing the nape of her neck. Each kiss he teased her, tasting a small sample of her beauty, while the rain continued to pour. (song) (Now that we're done what are you thinking, body so soft...")